how to deal with nanny at home 29

LOL. That's annoying, but I'd probably clbuttify it as not a big issue. Have you asked her to please wring out the sponge when she's done with it?

Unless Pillbug is so small that she's likely not to see him without her glbuttes, I'd say no biggie. (I can't get my husband, who needs *bifocals*, for heaven's sake, to wear his glbuttes!)

Well, I have to say, I don't think of my nanny as an educator; I think of her more as a babysitter who's here to meet the kids' needs and, as an added bonus, clean my house (which she does wonderfully, I must say!). I don't expect her to know much of anything about child development and actually, I don't even know what she *does* know about child development except that she has a 4yo of her own. I think of the educator job as belonging to school-preschool, not to the nanny, though I can see how others might look at it differently.

I think this is a bigger issue in that you want Pillbug to get as many opportunities as possible to develop these skills. If she's not allowing him to do things that will help him developmentally, she's holding him back. I'd say something like, "I know it's more work for you to clean up after him, feed himself. It's perfectly okay with me if you don't have time to do other things because you're spending extra time cleaning up after his meals, but it's really important to let him feed himself."

As far as her not understanding what the therapy session was about, if English isn't her first language, I think I would not be overly concerned about it. As long as she's getting him to his therapies regularly and and takes that seriously, that should be enough.

Again, I don't expect this of my nanny, but because I'm home to monitor things, I guess it's not as important to me. Yes, I'd expect her to have some clue about child safety if she's home alone with the children all the time. OTOH, I'm not even sure *I'm* completely up on child safety, so I'm not sure how you'd gauge that. If you've childproofed your home reasonably well and explained to her that things should be left as they are because it's safer for the children, you're probably okay (especially if, as you say, she is very attentive).

I found this sort of thing happened a lot more when I was pregnant and had a diaper generally, but I've occasionally missed one myself. I *never* missed on when I was pregnant, though! Well, it seems to me that most of it is a small deal and the few things that are bigger issues are probably addressable with gentle reminders and-or suggestions.

I think it's really difficult to have two women occupying the same space overlapping one another's jobs. It's worked okay in my household because we lay the ground rules down early and it's the norm rather than the exception, but even so, I know how hard it can be to bite your tongue when something bugs you. I've learned, however, to bite my tongue about some stuff because, in the scheme of things, I know the relationship is more important than the thing.

My two cents... -- Be well, Barbara Mom to Mr. Congeniality (7), the Diva (5) and the Race Car Fanatic (3)

I have PMS and ESP...I'm the unpleasant woman who knows everything! (T-shirt slogan)