Sue
Seriously? No, not personally. But I do know that is how the vast majority of the public gets its information. Even if they recognise it's not 'real', fiction is based on people's perception of what *is* real.
My discomfort is a pick your battles thing. I have a sister who is an MD, who is *very* anti-natural birth, anti-homebirth, anti-anything not medical. She voices her opinions on that loudly and frequently. I've long since had to listen to "any woman who says she doesn't want an epidural is playing the martyr. just watch, she'll be begging for one." I really didn't want to spend the next 9 months listening to that, is all.
I've also seen on other boards people who delight in the pain of others who've planned homebirths and end up having c-sections. because I am realistic, I know that all our plans for a homebirth may have gone out the window if an emergency came up. While I'd be disappointed, it's the way it is. But I figured I'd rather discuss it *after the fact*, once I'd had a successful homebirth, rather than to be told for 9 months "Just wait, you'll see, you'll be screaming for the hospital and drugs!" Along with all the garbage about how I'm a bad mother for making such a choice. The rest of my family is a non-issue. They'll think it odd and be concerned, but their comments are more easily ignored.
Now, all that said I may have been unfair, perhaps my sister won't be as shocked (tho her husband is about 10x more vocal than her on this and if I got past her, I'd still have ot hear him). Better for my own sanity to avoid discussion of it til it's done. Hopefully I'll still have that opportunity.
And I'll add that whilst I have incredibly wonderful and supportive friends, the whole homebirth issue is so incredibly foreign to most people, and the issue of childbirth so emotional, that one needs to take care in how it's discussed. Just like formula feeders who, at the mention of a breast feeding mother get up in arms in response to a perceived attack on their parenting, regardless of what the BF'ing mom says. Often her mere existence is enough to set someone off, I recognise that some will perceive my birth choices as a personal attack on their choices, even when they have zilch to do with anyone but myself, my partner and my child.
Oh, I shared her beliefs, but I was concerned her presentation of them, despite the facts presented, was too emotionally driven. As we all know, whilst emotionally driven arguments can be powerful, they don't hold sway with those looking for cold hard facts. She presents them, but in my opinion, in too emotional a manner.
I
Thank you. I hope so too. I have spent 35 yrs with my family, long enough to know what is useful to be discussed and what is better left alone.
