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I'm someone who stands up easily for myself, so I'm afraid I cannot be very sympathetic about this... My first thought upon reading your post is: Are you reading your own post? Do you see that you are teaching your daughter by example how to deal with bullies???
You HAVE to be your daughter's advocate. The other boy is a child; you can also teach him. Do you stop him when he twists your daughter's arm? I cannot believe that you would stand by and let that happen!
Whenever he does anything like that, you have to say something like: "we don't hurt other people", or "that's not nice", or something to that effect. If your daughter sees you doing nothing, she learns to do nothing.
You say you do not want to lose this friendship... Let me tell you, if you do not do anything, sometime sooner or later, you WILL lose this friendship. What will it take? When her son beats up your daughter in grade school?
my friend's controlling son 1080Hi there...you are right about many things, but I guess I wasn't clear in my first post about many other things. I'll try to explain more now: The first time this happened, I...
Why don't you try telling your friend gently what her son is doing? You don't have to accuse him of anything, just mention that he seems to be a bit bossy... Or, if he does do any arm- twisting, reprimand him gently in a voice loud enough for her to hear.
I am very worried for your daughter. But, like I said, I don't understand people who are timid and don't speak up for themselves. Mind you, I don't bully, but I don't let myself or my loved ones be bullied. I would NEVER let anyone bully my child! My child's well-being comes before my friendship with someone.
-- Anita --
